Episode Nineteen: The Splooge Job - kaseido/NeoTokyo GitHub Wiki

13-15 Genghis

Paragon did some research on the Sailor Scouts: mostly watching all the series and reading the manga. And all the Reddit posts about anger over Sailor Moon Crystal for being like the manga. WHYYYY. She appears in Star’s room to whine. Star’s baffled: “all of these people have been dead for 300 years, this doesn’t matter.” “What are you doing in my room? How did you get here?”

Maybe they’ll install a dumbwaiter as a cat-sized elevator, but Paragon would totally use it.

She’s also searched news articles – medias or wannabees blogging their exploits b/c posergangs have fans. Nothing stands out in 3-4 years of data. She hypothesizes that the gang only brings newbies in on the action when trusted noting that Venus was one of the latter Sailors in canon. She might have spent too much time comparing that to the media timeline.

Vir’s got plans for tonight: Sister Chromatid asked her out dancing to The Viper Room, a retro LA-based rock club.

Carbide is dive-bombed by one of the kittens, Boo. No, Boo doesn’t need anything, just playing. But totally in the air vents. Carbide wrangles a motorized thing with a laser pointer and a stick with a tassel, and puts it down for the kitten while he investigates the air vents. They unscrewed the things. “OK, we have tool using cats, that’s not a nightmare at all.”

He’s going to have to workshop kitten-proofing for the HVAC – falling onto spinning blades, not good. He texts Paragon: you might want to have a talk with Mango to talk with the kids about the dangers of the HVAC system because they’re in the vents now, and I’ll see what I can do about putting in safety netting.

Night calls a team meeting, including Uncle Firebrand.

First, she wants to announce that Chance won the Stelkath Prize for Comparative Economics for her book on pricing of artisan goods in pre-Enlightenment Vulcan and the Andorian Heroic Age. Apparently, if you’re a Federation citizen, you get a nice Lucite trophy. If you’re not, you get a nice Lucite trophy and a brick of latinum.

Chance kept the trophy, donated 10% of the cash to the Party, and – she throws up her hands – gave the rest to her. She’s going to use some of it to throw a party, but after Star’s next show.

She turns it over to Firebrand: They’ve been talking about the bee issue and the Dirty Hippies, and fate dropped something on them. They’d like to hire you for a quick job, right up your alley: a corporate heist of a biomedical package from a very remote lab – and likely the one the bee came from. So you may want to do some intel gathering on the side while you’re there.

The object in question is a 10 liter liquid nitrogen containment vessel. Deliver it intact to a Dirty Hippie agent at a rendezvous of your choice, and you’ll get NB4000.

Since Night didn’t exactly know how to handle Skyler, she’s not taking a cut on this one, and he’ll waive a cut: he’s got too many other things to think about right now, but that’s a one time only freebie.

Night takes over again: Apparently she didn’t - airquotes - vibe with Skyler eyeroll

Firebrand: not everybody is a basement gremlin!

Night: I’m a third-floor gremlin! Chance is a basement gremlin.

“I HEARD THAT!” from the third floor! Paragon high fives up to the ceiling, knowing Chance is high fiving back from the third floor. Anyway, she has done up a briefing packet based on - sigh - making sense out of the mess of info she got from Skyler. She shoots copy over to your Agents, but runs through everything anyway.

You’ll be going out to the Baikonur Industrial Zone. It’s 6 hours by bullet train from here – far AF, in other words. Train is NB50 each way, or 250 for a first-class suite. Take the regular Spire-Shimizu line to Little Saigon. Leaves Little Saigon 6 AM, arrives 12:15 PM, leaves 6 PM, arrives 12:15 AM.

The target location is a Wholesome Nature ag lab. They’ve been doing research on sheep – nevermind what those are, they’re waist high, fluffy and harmless. Please see figure 1 in your packets. Apparently they generate natural clothing fibers, which she thought was bullshit, but Friction says it’s true. Asterisk on Friction.

Vir is banging their head against the wall at the team’s lack of nature knowledge. Star did a movie with a CGI tennis ball she was acting against, but they did have an amazing song out of it. Everybody else’s clothes came out of a nice clean replicator. Vir says natural fiber clothes are just for rich people. Paragon asks about worms that poop clothing fiber. No, they spit them out. Star is weirded out that her silk is bug spit. Star also did a series as a 12 year old vet working with thoroughbreds. Twirly was the jockey in a remake of Seabiscut.

Night carries on: Apparently the Dirty Hippies really want the lab’s sheep data. They’ve got a spy onsite, but they’ve been unable to smuggle out data, so they want to go for a physical sample. While employees are thoroughly scanned for data - Agent jammers, electronics scans on exit, the usual - physical security is negligible, since they’re in the ass end of nowhere.

Your target is a 10 liter containment vessel of sheep semen scheduled for shipment on the 6pm bullet train on the 14th. It’s destined for a ConBrands farm in the outback, and to be picked up by ConBrands transport at Station 4 on the bullet train route. As far as the agent knows, it’s going as general cargo without special protections.

However! It’s essential the seal on the containment vessel remains intact. Contents are stored in liquid nitrogen at -195C, and the stuff spoils in seconds if it warms much above that. Which doesn’t sound like it makes a lot of sense, but what does she know, she studied computer science.

You have a photo of the spy and his Agent address. If you need to use it, you’ll need to exfil him too. The spy says policy is stuff to be shipped has to be in Shipping & Receiving by 3pm for the night train.

You’ll need transportation from the train station out to the site. You can take/hack a robotaxi or rent a car, or something else. How you structure the job is up to you. You can hit the warehouse or lab before shipment, hit the transport to the train, hit the train, or hit the ConBrands transport. That’s worst-case, as exfiltration from there will be really hard. You can arrange for a handoff in either Baikonur, Little Saigon, or Old Dome.

That’s the job. Now the side jobs. If you want to hit the net architecture, chances are good you can learn about the bee project. Also, Friction’s asked as a personal favor that if you do hit the databases, you scrape everything corporate for her: her parents were killed working for Wholesome, though not that facility, and she’d love to learn anything she can.

So, plan, and let her know what you come up with, and she’ll pass it on to Skyler to coordinate your handoff, payment, and exfil if need be.

Vir suggests a big sack, Carbide suggests a decoy cylinder – he can make something that looks like that with a fake readout to swap out. They won’t notice until they open it that there won’t be sheep semen.

Para thought Friction wanted wiped architecture, not data. That’s easy. Everybody else is appalled at the thought of making another corporate enemy. Star says, “The neighborhood was just attacked by a corp, Paragon, let’s not bring another one down on us.” Paragon wants to find someone who’s not paying her and wipe their hard drive. Even Bizgal is working for Sue, and you don’t want to fuck with Sue. And Paragon doesn’t want to fuck with Star. Star adds that she knows where Paragon lives.

Carbide suggests just coming in across country: walk right up to the building and own the cameras and internet.

Vir asks if Star would like to reprise the doctor role and pretend to be an emergency vet for the animals. Paragon suggests Klingon blood fleas: they have a drive to conquer!

Carbide is concerned that the fields may be more secure than the spy indicated. Vir says figure out if it’s a reasonable walk.

Star vetoes wearing berets. “I AM A LEGITIMATE DOCTOR!” they have to wear those thingies on their heads with the silver discs. Vir says the higher rank you are the fancier they are. Star wants a mask one with a point.

Tension between hiking across the field or doing the doctor thing. Star wants to make an appointment: can Para hack her a legit appointment? Not without being onsite, but if they can get her close enough to an actual employee, to get into their Agent enough to get to their calendar and if they have access to the corporate calendar, then maybe. But a whole string of maybes.

Vir – if there was somebody who legit wanted a check for blood fleas? Para: could cold call and say “things.” Carbide: that relies on somebody other than Star being able to talk to people. Star says make your boyfriend do it. Para: he can corporate but there isn’t reason for him to care what’s going on at another corp. Star, maybe he has a pet sheep or wants to buy a genetically spayed one and is going to send his vet over there to oversee production.

Carbide suggests they just walk up the back to Shipping & Receiving, swap cans and walk away. Vir wonders if they need to acquire a vehicle. Paragon adds that she can get to the system from the loading dock, probably.

Carbide needs to make a decoy canister of the proper weight. Paragon suggests fruit punch and marshmallow fluff. Lime jello, colored marshmallows now all the same color and slices of hot dog and green beans scattered through. He builds for adjustable magnetic weights he can clamp onto the bottom to get the matching weight. Vir supplies a recipe from mom.

Thus the handoff should be in an alley by the train station in Baikonur. Carbide says never hold onto the hot loot longer than you have to. Make it somebody else’s problem as soon as possible, just come home with the credit chit.

Vir makes the jello mold, with kibble instead of hot dogs.

Paragon learns that it’s 3 miles offroad to approach from the back, about an hour of walking. Carbide will carry in a backpack, as he’s going to do the swap, and he does a laborer impression better. Vir will be assisting Dr Star The Vet in the backup plan.

Paragon agrees that they should split the party, Dr Star to be a distraction. She doesn’t necessarily believe the spy on no security. Send the least verbally tricksy around the back door, Vir is actually medical and might be able to pick up info visually from the labs while Star talks to people.

Star should probably read a book or something?

Paragon suggests Star and Vir go first class, the “laborers” not. They investigate what the security is on the train: nothing to be concerned about. (Star assumes that cattle class is just like first class but with bottom shelf alcohol and no choice of perfumes in the bathrooms)

Vir’s goes on their date, and it’s fine, nothing wrong, Vir was dancing okay. Both had an okay time. Star kept frantically tweeting for updates. “Your footwear is adequate and I think you’re smart enough to be with me”. Star gives tips on moves. Real time Cyrano-ing destroys her spontaneity. Vir’s back by 4am.

The next morning they head off early for the train.

On arrival, Star and Vir kill time at the train station – Star doesn’t want to vamp for an hour.

Carbide is dying of allergies, and Vir has the drugs back in town. He puts on his breath mask. Neither of them can walk outdoors, and they just die. Carbide calls Star, Para lies face down on the ground. “Take your time over lunch and tangentially we’re putting Para on a cardio regimen when we get back,” and snaps a photo of her lying facedown. Star suggests “Get Fit With Happy Aura”

It takes them over two hours to cross the fields. Using his TeleOptics, Carbide sees medium-sized animals from a distance, and recognizes them as security geese, noting that some of them have cyber-eyes, presumably feeding to a security station. He easily remote-hacks the wired geese, and somehow charms the rest into eating pocket kibble and not sounding an alarm.

They sneak up to the Shipping & Receiving building, Carbide watching until the clerk finishes with the canister and goes back to stacking boxes. Paragon sneaks in and grabs the canister.

They do the swap outside. Paragon then hacks the network: they have a perfect copy of the network running on a virtual machine inside Dino. Paragon borrows a handkerchief, writes WHOLESOME NATURE CEO on it and ties it around Dino’s neck like a kerchief. She sneaks back in to make the swap.

Since Carbide never called to say they arrived, Star and Vir are STILL having lunch at a local brewery, still sampling IPAs as Vir recaps all the stupid things they said at their date. They went antiquing first…

Carbide makes the handoff to the Dirty Hippie agent, who gave the recognition codes and handed over the credit chip for the job. He finds Star and Vir, making a flat aggrieved expression – behind his breath mask. “OK, I need a beer and Paragon should have something to drink, where is this brewery?” Star recommends the pear cider. She bought a spinning wheel antiquing. She spent 500 and made NO profit on the job.

They return without incident.